Kindergarten Blues

Unlike our American friends, the beginning of the year also marks the beginning of the school year in Malaysia. So the past few days, we've had many scared children going to school for the first time and many parents going through the "is my kid going to be okay in school?" phase. I'm one of them.

This year I have one kid that's starting kindergarten for the first time. He starts formal school (Standard 1) next year and so I thought I'd have him experience 1 year of kindergarten. Hopefully easing into the school system next year would be smoother . Unlike most parents forking out RM700-RM900 for kindy registration and RM200-RM250 monthly fees, I have only to pay RM220 for the entire year. You see, I opted to send my son to a government kindy rather than a commercial one. The kindy is in the primary school that he will be attending next year.

Small little building tucked in the back corner of the primary school.

The cheaper fees is definitely a plus. My only concern is that all the other kindergarten kids are Muslim and speak Bahasa Malaysia. I'm not so bothered about the racial inbalance (because we are all "anak Malaysia" right?) but rather the language barrier. I've tried to teach KokoD some Bahasa the last one year but his motivation to learn was not so great. Therefore, his fluency in the language is extremely limited. He was excited to go to school the first day but quickly became withdrawn when he realized he couldn't communicate with the other children.

See his very UN-enthusiastic look.

The teacher spoke to me yesterday and requested that we speak Bahasa to him at home so he can pick up the language faster. Yesterday he came home very angry. He found school to be boring and wanted to come home earlier. Of course the teacher had to keep him there until it was time to go home. So I had to deal with a very angry little boy yesterday. DH found the way to cheer him up - gave him time to play computer games :) Of course there was pep talk at night too. I asked him what were some things he wanted to say but didn't know how. In the end we settled on these 3 simple phrases:

- Siapa nama kamu? (What is your name?)
- Boleh saya jadi kawan kamu? (Can I be your friend?)
- Boley saya main sama? (Can I play with you?)

When I dropped him off this morning, he still wanted to stay clutched to my leg. I kept shooing him to the playground where the other kids were. He pretty much stayed away from all the other kids. I feel a little sad that he has to go through this tough time of trying to adapt. BUT when I picked him up after school, I was happy to hear that today was a better day for him. YAY!

One good thing I have to say about my boy is that even though he dislikes going to kindy at the moment and says he doesn't want to go anymore, he's not kicked up a fuss about it. When it's time to wake up, he does so. When it's time to go to school, he gets in the car. When school starts, he obediently goes to the class.

My boy who doesn't nap came home and crashed after the first day of school. Sigh! Must have been a stressful morning. Unfortunately the napping trend did not continue the following days. Darn!

His sister on the other hand was very excited to go back to school. Why? Because now she's a prefect mah. Yeah, get to dorn the special blue shirt.

Ready for duty sir!

Mamas Parenting Tips:

• How children react to their first school experience depends a lot on their natural disposition. Some children are natural social butterflies. Some are more quiet and take longer to warm up to the situation. A great book to read is Personality Plus for Parents: Understanding What Makes Your Child Tick
  
  It's important that you do NOT compare your children to others. Don't say "See how happy that child is? Can't you be like her?" or "Your siblings didn't have a problem, why are you acting this way?" What they need is for us to understand their feelings. Don't brush away their fear like "Aiyah, there is nothing to be scared about." But rather help them to cope by identifying with them e.g. "Mommy was scared too the first time I mommy went to school." See if you can figure out together how to make the experience better. Of course, hopefully the teacher is also helpful and compassionate.
  

Starting School - Part 2

Yesterday's first day of school was deemed "boring" by K. Well, today she had a bit of "stress" (including mommy).

Had a phone call about 12:30pm today saying Karina had missed her school van and was crying. So faster than a speeding bullet, mommy rushed over to look for her. As I pulled into the carpark, I saw the van just leaving the school. The 'pakcik' said he couldn't find my dear K. I look at all the children around the gate and didn't see her. So I went inside the school, to the school office and the teacher's room and no sign of her. Went outside again and finally, saw the back of a little girl in her baju kurung uniform standing in the sun. With tear stained eyes, she hugged mommy tight-tight.

Don't know how this little girl couldn't locate her school van. Plus I believe the poor 'pakcik' couldn't recognize her because wearing baju kurung, she looked like all the rest of the Malay girls. Even I missed her the first time round. Thank goodness I made her memorize the house phone number. Also repeatedly drilled her on what to do in case such an incident were to happen - go to the school office and call home or locate your teacher. Thank goodness all that preparation helped. Other things taught were not to follow strangers e.g. don't trust anyone who comes up to you and say "your mom asked me to pick you up" or "the pakcik asked me to come get you."

Another lesson for today was regarding pocket money. She told me she had given her friend RM2 to go buy chicken nuggets for her. Her friend gave her back RM1. In her little mind, all is fine and dandy. Afterall, her friend did give her back some money. Well, all would have been well if it were not for the fact:

1. I cooked her chicken nuggets to take to school, so why in the world is she still buying chicken nuggets??????
2. She didn't eat the chicken nuggets that were bought, her friend ate it all. So, in other words, she 'belanja' the friend a meal lah.
3. She didn't finish eating the chicken nuggets in her lunch box.
4. Her friend didn't ask for the money, she voluntarily gave the money to her friend.

Asked her why? I get the famous answer "don't know!" Sigh! Okay, pocket money is now slashed from RM1.50 to 60 cents. Sigh!

Mamas Bag of Tricks

1. Repeatedly drill your children on safety procedures. Tell 101 times also nevermind.
2. Make sure they know how to contact you. Either memorize or write down phone numbers and address.
3. Don't forget to assure them if anything goes wrong, you will come and get them. So it is NOT a big catastrophe. Mommy/daddy WILL COME for them.
4. Don't simply give money to your friends. Mommy/daddy not rich you know!

Starting School

I guess I join the many parents out there whose child is starting school for the first time. Since my DD is in the morning school, we woke up early to catch her van transport. I asked her if she was excited, she said "No." BUT I knew she was as she was out at the gate very early (6:45am) waiting for the van rather impatiently, plus she packed her school bag the afternoon before.
My girl is rather independant so I don't really worry about her starting school. I think most children starting Std. 1 are already regular school goers because of kindergarten. So, there was hardly any fussing or crying going on. Actually, the worried onces were the parents anxiously standing around, finding it difficult to let go.
My only worries for DD are:

1. She won't understand what everyone is talking about because her Bahasa Malaysia is not that great.
2. She won't know how to find the van that is her transport home. Or she will get into the wrong van. Went to the school to make sure she knows how to identify the van and get on the right one.

Orientation day was on the 1/1/2008. They highlighted 3 things to the parents:

1. Transitional period - The children will go through a 3 week transitional program. It's a time for teachers to get to know the pupils, for pupils to get to know other pupils, and also to familiarize them with the school compound. Basically, to get them to transition from kindergarten to a bigger, formal school environment. So they will be no learning for this 3 weeks. They tell us this coz' they don't want parents to call and question them "why my child no homework ah?" or "why my child say they only jalan-jalan in school today?" They also told us the child does not need to bring any books during this time, just writing material and color pencils. Talking about books, the said they will only give during the 2nd week but today she already brought home some.
2. KIA 2M - I think that's what it's called. The kids will be given an evaluation test (one on one with the teacher I believe) to gauge their reading, writing and counting skills. Those that don't have sufficient reading skills will attend this special KIA 2M class. Evaluations are done 3 times a year. Any time they pass the evaluation test, they will be integrated back to the normal class. According to the teacher, there are children that start school without even knowing the alphabets even though they've already attended 2 years of kindergarten. This program is to ensure all children have basic reading and writing skills. Oh, must add that this is only for Bahasa Malaysia.
3. Special education class - I'm impressed that this school actually have a class for children with special needs. Teachers will monitor the children and those that need special attention, will be transfered to the special education class.

Now, I don't know if this is the same for all schools. I'm sure the Chinese schools will differ. But maybe these 3 programs are the same for all kebangsaan schools?

Okay, so how was the first day of school for K? One word-- BORING!
Why? Because they didn't do any work. Nevermindlah, you come back home, mommy give you plenty of work okay? :) I guess the following can be a tip:

• Don't hype up too much the experience of starting school. In other words, don't tell children "it will be sooo great" or "it will be fun, you make new friends, learn new things" etc.... First day of school will generally be confusing and like my daughter said, BORING. Be realistic and let your children know that the first few days is a transitional period. Teachers are getting things in order, new students are figuring how things work.

Here's a list of how much we spent or what we got for getting ready for school:

1. School bag - given by friend. Not advisable to get the roller/pulley bags because they don't last long. If you have to carry them, they are heavier than normal bags. Plus, you can't roll them everywhere e.g. staircase, uneven terrain.
2. Pencil box with pencils, eraser, pencil sharpener, ruler - given as Christmas present.
3. Color pencils - given as a Christmas present.
4. Water bottle - given as a Christmas present.
5. Food container for recess - just an old one from the house.
6. Wallet - given as a Christmas present.
7. Watch - RM10.00
8. Glitter pen (marker pen also okay, but glitter pen looks nicer mah) - to write her names on her bags, pencil box etc.... Plus glitter pen can be used for other art and craft work -- err... can't remember how much it cost.
9. 2 pairs of school shoes - RM23.99 each.
10. 1 set baju kurung uniform - RM40.80
11. 2 sets pinafore uniform - RM69.60
12. 4 pairs of white socks - RM11.80
13. Exercise books and school badge - RM23.60
14. School fees and whatever other fees like PIBG, sports, awards etc... - RM148.65

Another thing I realized today that I should get for her - umbrella or raincoat. Okay, I hope this has been somewhat helpful to parents who will have children starting Std. 1 next year.