Friday, September 21, 2012

How Old To Pierce Your Daughter's Ears

Finally got my little girl's ears pierced. My mom has been asking me when we were going to do it. So, when her 3rd birthday rolled along, we took her to the goldsmith shop and got it done.

I'm not sure if she really knew what was going to happen. The salesgirl brought out the earrings for her to choose. At first she pointed to the sparkling pink stone. Then the girl brought out some pearl ones and she quickly changed her mind and wanted that instead.

I told her briefly that it was going to hurt a little. The salesgirl was quite good too. Kept reassuring her that it was going to be okay. As the gun pierced her ears, there was a look of shock on her face BUT no tears, no crying... not a sound. She bravely let the girl do the other ear. When it was done, I quickly carried her to the mirror and kept telling her how beautiful she looked. That was my distraction plan.

It has been a few days now. So far no problem with the ears. I just keep dabbing the ears with baby oil.

With my eldest girl, my mom took her to pierce her ears very early too. Can't quite remember when... maybe when she was 2+. I know in the Indian culture, they pierce their daughter's ears very early, when they are still a baby.

I didn't want to do it when they were still babies because if it hurt or was uncomfortable, they wouldn't be able to tell and might even pull it with their hands, thus making it worse. The downside is if you wait until they are older, they might not want to do it and won't let you do it too.

So, did you get your daughter's ears pierced and how old was she?


  1. Pearsonally i do not have a child yet, but my mom always thought that you should wait until they can make their own choice and keep it clean by themselves. Also if they choose not to have it done, at least it was theire choice.

  2. We made the decision for 7 years. Basically this let's them choose, they feel empowered by making a choice for themselves and understand what is happening. My main concern is the earrings getting caught on things.
    She's now 14 years and has made some comments along the lines of - "I'm glad you waited now Mum, I can see why"
    Her little sister will get hers done in the next year or so. And I'll get mine done with her - I'm 44 and wanted to get them done last year - but it will be special to get them done together, I might need her to hold my hand lol!

    1. Wishing you all the best. Yes, I'm sure you'll need that hand to hold :) Hopefully it won't hurt too bad.

  3. My rule of thumb was to wait until they were 5. That way they are more likely to have the ear rings positioned in the right spot in the ear lobe (not to high, not too low) and it could be based on their choice. My eldest daughter was keen to have hers done but when she turned 5 she changed her mind...she was closer to 6 and one day said "can i have them done now?" and that was it, they were pierced. Until age 10 she was only ever allowed to wear the ear rings that they pierce them with or real silver or real gold, no costume stuff. My second daughter had her ears pierced for her 5th birthday.

    I haven't had problems with either child with any infection or anything because at 5 they can help care for them themselves - as part of the morning and evening routine of doing teeth etc they had to clear their ears with the cleaning solution to look after them.

    I am not a fan of children under the age of 5 having their ears pierced but i am not judgmental of those who do it - each to their own, but for me and my family, 5 was the magic number.

    I wasn't allowed to have mine pierced until i was 12.

  4. My girl is 6 years old now and I asked her few times whether she wants to pierce her eyes or not. Though she wants to be beautiful she is afraid of pain etc. Hmm, my thought is it would be easier to do it at younger age say 5 or 6 than when they are older. I had mine when I was in my secondary school and I have to stop eating seafood etc for a month or so because of infection worries etc.

  5. I am not going to berate you for piercing your daughter's ears. However, the second last sentence made me cringe: "The downside is if you wait until they are older, they might not want to do it and won't let you do it too."
    So what? Is it that essential to have pierced ears? Surely if they don't want to have them done, that's their decision.
    My mum and I had our ears pierced together when I was 8 or so. She believed in me being old enough to make this decision myself at an age when I understood the process. I had been asking to have them pierced earlier but she didn't let me. Which I now totally understand. It is just too dangerous on toddlers in my opinion. I've seen my share of ripped and infected earlobes in small children.
    My daughter is 5 now and she keeps asking to have hers pierced, too. I bought her some stick-on ones which makes her happy for the time being. She'll have to wait a few more years before I will let her pierce them. Basically when she is able to care for them herself. Maybe around 10.

    1. You are right, it isn't essential to have pierced ears. And I guess I didn't write that sentence clear enough and the message came out wrong. What I was getting at was the fear of pain when they are older that prevents them from getting it done. For example, they see their friends wearing beautiful earrings, they wish they could too but are scared to get it done.

      And like you didn't berate me for piercing my daughter's ears, I won't berate you for not piercing your daughter's ears. This is because I believe that every parent knows their child the best. We know what our children are capable of, their strengths, weaknesses, maturity etc.... Unless you are in that other person's shoes, it is always unfair to pass judgement. We can only share our experiences. And we also have to account our different backgrounds, upbringing and culture.

      Thanks for sharing.

  6. I got my girls pierced their ears when one was 4 and another was 6.

    Ai Lian, just to remind you that you need to always put ointment on her ears. It tends to get infection on the wound.

    1. Thanks for the reminder. I've been keeping a close watch to make sure there is no infection. Everything seems okay up to now.


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